268 Days of Tea and Roses (well, maybe not the roses part….)

image I didn’t really plan to get this far in my alcohol free journey  as it didn’t seem at all possible. But I’m here, insanely happy and almost bursting with pride.

In the beginning, I spent a lot of time reading blogs about quitting drinking and noticed that not many keep updating past a few months. That scared me as I took it to be an indication that they weren’t able to stay on the happy train.

Now I think it’s more a case of they reach a  stage where they feel safe enough to go it alone or it just doesn’t register in their daily life anymore. I’m a mixture of both, quite safe and not as many triggers.

But I am reminded of it in positive ways many times a day. First off, the mirror. I no longer stare at my eyes to see if they’ve turned yellow. And if my bags are really crap one day, I can honestly blame it on a bad reaction to my wrinkle cream. No shame there! I no longer have to suck on cough sweets all day at work to hide the smell of stale wine. I don’t cringe when the trash truck picks up my recycle can that used to house enough empty wine bottles to start a winery. And of course, I no longer wake up at 3:00am in a blind panic and try and remember what the hell happened the night before.

I do still get sad, mad, angry, paranoid and anxious, it’s just a million times milder than before. On the very odd occasion, I miss the feeling of drifting off into Stella’s Wine World, but I just wait a few minutes and it passes. Takes about the same amount of time as it takes my tea to brew in the teapot. It’s true, tea does fix everything!

It still feels a tad unreal. Nobody around me has changed their habits or batted an eyelid really. I’ve done sober flights, a wedding, family celebrations and sober sunsets. I’ve also cut my hair, bought makeup and lost 20 pounds. Pretty fair to say it’s the best I’ve looked and felt in my life. The makeup isn’t a mask by the way, it’s just because I can actually bear to look at myself in the mirror and I no longer feel the need to hide myself away in disgust like I used to.

I’m on the countdown now to my first year anniversary. 97 days to go. I’m not going to say it will be a doddle, because it won’t. Nothing in life is. Some days are good, others are not. That’s just the way life is. Swings and roundabouts, a balancing act and lots of tea. Off to put my lippy on now…💋

 

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6 thoughts on “268 Days of Tea and Roses (well, maybe not the roses part….)

  1. This is SO good to read and I am so very happy for you, you sound amazing and so well deserved! I think you are right in that some people get their sober footing and move on, staying sober just needing less support and accountability.
    I know that people around you haven’t changed, but in case no one has told you….you are beautiful, strong, courageous and an inspiration!!! Here is to a Happy New Year and may 2017 be your best year yet! Huge hugs and support 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your lovely response! And congratulations to you on your sober Christmas, you sound so happy and you should be so proud of yourself. I still feel like punching myself now and again to see if this is all real! Quitting wine is the BEST decision I ever made. Wishing you all the best for 2017! X

      Liked by 1 person

  2. 268 days is great! The more sober firsts we over come the stronger we get. I don’t blog as much as I did in the beginning but I know that if I reach out there are some amazing people in this soberverse who will be there for me and vice verser.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well done you! Wishing you a wonderful 2017 with lots of continued good things! And hey, you don’t have to have an excuse for wearing makeup! It’s part of what makes many of us feel good about how we present ourselves to the world! I know you look great! And that it’s coming from the inside out.
    Xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

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